last night i had party going on in my house. some people came. i was so glad to meet them after two weeks off from school. but still there is a lil bit sadness from the deepest of my heart. first, I'm gonna leave soon. second, my very best friend couldn't make my party. but overall, that was so much fun. presents, laughter, stories, all the things were just to make me so happy. i couldn't tell how happy i was. i really miss them right now. tomoro, i am planning to hang out with Sarah. i hope we both can make it since it will be last day i will spend with my family, and also not much time left to do something. other than that, Cherice wanna make something special for me. i don't know what. but i hope i could make it to her house. for three different people in a day. i don't know how to spare my time with them in my very last day in the United States. 24 hours. not much.
i still remember how tons of my friends count days in the 100 last days. 3 months. until i realize that actually I'm gonna leave in less than 3 days. 3 months, 3 weeks, then 3 days. and maybe 3 hours? even 3 minutes before i get in to the bus which take me to JFK in Long Island.
today, i spent my time with very good friend of mine. she is so sweet. today i try to make my face happy in front of a lot of people, including her. she might feel the same. pretending to be happy in every person we meet. idk, it just makes my stomach hurts, my heart beats faster, and kinda makes my mind dizzy. you know what? i am already home. i don't have to go home, because i already am. home? what home?
maybe i don't know how to tell my exact feeling right now. just between happiness and sadness. mix in one place. maybe the good thing to express it is just tears. it could be happy or sad. bad thing, i can't cry in front of people. i might just cry in the deepest of my heart. bad thing, i can't tell people how much i love them. and bad thing, i can't tell people that i cry out loud in the deepest of my heart.
thank you good people, you make my day full of color. sometimes dark sometimes bright. =)
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
wanna know about me?
I dont know if this is important for you, but check it up
Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.please say thanks
i keep thinking why people always complain about something. i know i do too. i always complain about my stupid class and other. but you know what? watch other kids that don't get to school at all. they don't get chance to have class and get education as i do. i always complain why my parents give me a lil amount of money than the other parents do to their kids. i know this because they wanna bring me up to college. they want me to be a success person
lately i always heard complaining about this kid about her family. oh come on girl. you got all you want. you got everything that you need from your parents. they give you stuff you need. you keep complaining complaining and complaining. shut the hell up! please say thanks to them. if i were you i always be thankful and happy with all of those. and you know what, they dont just give you stuff that you think you need, but they also give you love. they treat you well. they love you so much. what the hell that you complain again?? that makes no sense. i hope i can come right in front of your face and slap you hard.
lately i always heard complaining about this kid about her family. oh come on girl. you got all you want. you got everything that you need from your parents. they give you stuff you need. you keep complaining complaining and complaining. shut the hell up! please say thanks to them. if i were you i always be thankful and happy with all of those. and you know what, they dont just give you stuff that you think you need, but they also give you love. they treat you well. they love you so much. what the hell that you complain again?? that makes no sense. i hope i can come right in front of your face and slap you hard.
can't hold this
A: you see that! you are really doing a great job. i'm so proud of you. see the other kids. they just doing stupid and boring things!
B: you can't eat that. they are all mine. uhhm no actually you can eat it but get me this thing first
C: ouchhhh that hurts!!!!! (actually that doesn't hurt at all).
D: you know what, that's easy. i can do it. i can even beat them.
E: no. you can't do it!!! because i said so!
B: you can't eat that. they are all mine. uhhm no actually you can eat it but get me this thing first
C: ouchhhh that hurts!!!!! (actually that doesn't hurt at all).
D: you know what, that's easy. i can do it. i can even beat them.
E: no. you can't do it!!! because i said so!
wish i could
i wish i could say this to 10 different people:
1. who do you think you are? you almost ruin my life, don't you know that?
2. there is better people than you out there. just let you know that you are not the best.
3. please keep your mouth shut. i'm tired of hearing you.
4. don't be so hypocrite!
5. use your brain, stupid!
6. stop complaining! you got all the things you want in your life.
7. where is your attention?
8. don't be such dumb liar! i'm watching you
9. you are a jerk!
10. keep your nose out from their business!
1. who do you think you are? you almost ruin my life, don't you know that?
2. there is better people than you out there. just let you know that you are not the best.
3. please keep your mouth shut. i'm tired of hearing you.
4. don't be so hypocrite!
5. use your brain, stupid!
6. stop complaining! you got all the things you want in your life.
7. where is your attention?
8. don't be such dumb liar! i'm watching you
9. you are a jerk!
10. keep your nose out from their business!
Thursday, June 18, 2009
are you a mom?
today i went to mom's school. i have nothing to do this week and next week, uhmm basically the rest of my stay here, i have free time. except for next tuesday i have math B regent. so i went to mom' school and got rid of my boringness (is that even a word?). i hang out at mom's class, helping the kids did their works, teared off bunch of posters, and watching charlie chaplin with the kids.
the friends of mom asked me to come to their class. the class that i came in the first time was okay, they told me about their field trip yesterday. that sounds fun. they went to this place called dang! i forget. but anyweiz this place is so pretty. the teacher let me take a look at the pictures she has taken. there were cave, waterfall, and stones wall (idk it looks like a great wall of china,not that big though, it's so much shorter and made out of stone, i mean it's the shape of the stone it self). the kids also asked me bunch of question about me. not that question above "are you a mom?" no,not that.
"are you a mom?" thingy happened when i came to the second class. i'm sorry but i think the teacher is creepy. anyweiz i think i was passed out and told the teacher when she asked me if i'm gonna have presentation in her class, i said no. actually i wasn't clear about her question and i decided to say no. duh! i realized that was wrong answer! so i realized that i was just gonna help her students did their work. and guess what what were they doing? spanish. gubrak!!! i have just learned spanish for a year. and they have been learning spanish from kindergarten. what can i do???? no hablo espanol. then i just walked around the classroom, acted like i know what i was doing. fortunatelly no one asked me to correct their work. and then i came to this group of girls, they were working on their father's day card. two of them were latino, one of them african american. the african american girl one asked me "are you a mom?" i was about gonna say "duh, do i look that old???" but no, i dont wanna torture this girls more because i think having that teacher might have been a torture for them, then i just said "no girls, i'm an exchange student"
i finally got home, and i'm so tired now. byeee
the friends of mom asked me to come to their class. the class that i came in the first time was okay, they told me about their field trip yesterday. that sounds fun. they went to this place called dang! i forget. but anyweiz this place is so pretty. the teacher let me take a look at the pictures she has taken. there were cave, waterfall, and stones wall (idk it looks like a great wall of china,not that big though, it's so much shorter and made out of stone, i mean it's the shape of the stone it self). the kids also asked me bunch of question about me. not that question above "are you a mom?" no,not that.
"are you a mom?" thingy happened when i came to the second class. i'm sorry but i think the teacher is creepy. anyweiz i think i was passed out and told the teacher when she asked me if i'm gonna have presentation in her class, i said no. actually i wasn't clear about her question and i decided to say no. duh! i realized that was wrong answer! so i realized that i was just gonna help her students did their work. and guess what what were they doing? spanish. gubrak!!! i have just learned spanish for a year. and they have been learning spanish from kindergarten. what can i do???? no hablo espanol. then i just walked around the classroom, acted like i know what i was doing. fortunatelly no one asked me to correct their work. and then i came to this group of girls, they were working on their father's day card. two of them were latino, one of them african american. the african american girl one asked me "are you a mom?" i was about gonna say "duh, do i look that old???" but no, i dont wanna torture this girls more because i think having that teacher might have been a torture for them, then i just said "no girls, i'm an exchange student"
i finally got home, and i'm so tired now. byeee
Friday, June 12, 2009
i'm bored
i just have french final today. it wasn't that bad. i just have to answer 100 multiple choice and 10 short answers and make a letter to pen pal. viola! c'est pas mal. but one thing is i'm not gonna be at that class again. c'est ammusant ou terrible? idk. i love french so much. i love how they speak. aniweis now i'm alone. i couldn't find somebody to talk to. where are you people??? i looked for sheena but she was no where in my sight. then the others? they have classes. je suis triste.
by the way, idk why i feel so sick if i do not talk to somebody. it's like if i wanna say something but i can't or afraid then i decided not to talk, i will be so mad to my self. i feel regret then so on, it freaks me out. but idk why i still keep this up till now. oh come on ve! speak up! i know you hate it when you have to be silent. just say whatever in your mind, they wouldn't mind to listen to you. yeah,actually that's true. today after i locked my mouth up for like an hour then i talk to somebody, i feel so happy. i know that's weird if you find happiness by talking to somebody. but it's me. it's me. it's' not you.
and oh yeah, i gotta make a plan for my graduation party. mom told me to do so. i just told her that im gonna invite my friends over. actually that's not what graduation party supposed to be. they usually make an open house, then people can come whenever they want. i just not feel comfortable with this, beside it will make me so tired for serve people in one full day, i just don't have that many friends like my friends do to be invited. no offense, i just have been here for a year, that's ok with the fact that i don't have that many friends. i do have friends tho. yea, that's why i think if i have a party in certain time is better than doing open house. i hope people are able to make my party. i just worried if they have gotten invited by their other friends and they couldnt make it. i will be so sad knowing that they actually what i called friends from thousands people who is going to niskayuna high school, not going to my party.
hey, sheena is here! lol. she was questioning me how to open facebook at school, actually we are not allowed to open certain website. and school usually blocks them. but i know how to break the wall and the security. hehe. other student do too, so it's common "criminal" at my school. just wait till the "guard" (idk what they are called) yell at us and make us go away from the lab. i got it once. whatever..
and omigosh! 17 days left! and sheena left me too, she has class now. ok then i'm still so bored.
au revoir!
by the way, idk why i feel so sick if i do not talk to somebody. it's like if i wanna say something but i can't or afraid then i decided not to talk, i will be so mad to my self. i feel regret then so on, it freaks me out. but idk why i still keep this up till now. oh come on ve! speak up! i know you hate it when you have to be silent. just say whatever in your mind, they wouldn't mind to listen to you. yeah,actually that's true. today after i locked my mouth up for like an hour then i talk to somebody, i feel so happy. i know that's weird if you find happiness by talking to somebody. but it's me. it's me. it's' not you.
and oh yeah, i gotta make a plan for my graduation party. mom told me to do so. i just told her that im gonna invite my friends over. actually that's not what graduation party supposed to be. they usually make an open house, then people can come whenever they want. i just not feel comfortable with this, beside it will make me so tired for serve people in one full day, i just don't have that many friends like my friends do to be invited. no offense, i just have been here for a year, that's ok with the fact that i don't have that many friends. i do have friends tho. yea, that's why i think if i have a party in certain time is better than doing open house. i hope people are able to make my party. i just worried if they have gotten invited by their other friends and they couldnt make it. i will be so sad knowing that they actually what i called friends from thousands people who is going to niskayuna high school, not going to my party.
hey, sheena is here! lol. she was questioning me how to open facebook at school, actually we are not allowed to open certain website. and school usually blocks them. but i know how to break the wall and the security. hehe. other student do too, so it's common "criminal" at my school. just wait till the "guard" (idk what they are called) yell at us and make us go away from the lab. i got it once. whatever..
and omigosh! 17 days left! and sheena left me too, she has class now. ok then i'm still so bored.
au revoir!
Thursday, June 11, 2009
18 days
Vita,
i love you so much! i can't believe we have met each other for a year already. you are my best friend forever. you are the one i can share and talk to. i can't imagine if i miss you next year. you always be nice to me. we have lunch and spanish together. we should have more class together. i love being with you. i don't want you to be an exchange student so that you can be with me forever in the United States. i hope that would not be the first time and the last time we met. ^_^
i will be sad without you.
i hope we will meet again in the United States/ Hongkong/ Indonesia. if you come to Hongkong, just let me know. i will take care of you only a second (just kidding). whenever how long you want to stay there.
keep in touch. love ya. <3
you are the most creepy girl i have met. but i love to be with you because i am creepy too. ^_^
Sheena
i got this letter this morning before math final. 18 days more. i will be home. i leave home, i come home. what is home?
i love you so much! i can't believe we have met each other for a year already. you are my best friend forever. you are the one i can share and talk to. i can't imagine if i miss you next year. you always be nice to me. we have lunch and spanish together. we should have more class together. i love being with you. i don't want you to be an exchange student so that you can be with me forever in the United States. i hope that would not be the first time and the last time we met. ^_^
i will be sad without you.
i hope we will meet again in the United States/ Hongkong/ Indonesia. if you come to Hongkong, just let me know. i will take care of you only a second (just kidding). whenever how long you want to stay there.
keep in touch. love ya. <3
you are the most creepy girl i have met. but i love to be with you because i am creepy too. ^_^
Sheena
i got this letter this morning before math final. 18 days more. i will be home. i leave home, i come home. what is home?
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
good or ridiculous?
what have i been doing after one year in the United States?
1. get up at 6.30
2. rarely take a shower
3. dont care what i wear at school
4. walk faster
5. can't stay away from facebook
6. search on the internet in english for whatever reason
7. have hard time to find the exact word that i want in indonesian
8. misspell some words like americans do
9. say hi back instantly after someone says hi to me, altho i dunno who that dude is
10. often find my private fun time
11. eat anything without complaining
12. sleeping on the weekend
13. wash my own cloth and fold them neatly
14. take a shower faster
15. need someone to take me somewhere
16. use calculator just for multiply 12 with 2
1. get up at 6.30
2. rarely take a shower
3. dont care what i wear at school
4. walk faster
5. can't stay away from facebook
6. search on the internet in english for whatever reason
7. have hard time to find the exact word that i want in indonesian
8. misspell some words like americans do
9. say hi back instantly after someone says hi to me, altho i dunno who that dude is
10. often find my private fun time
11. eat anything without complaining
12. sleeping on the weekend
13. wash my own cloth and fold them neatly
14. take a shower faster
15. need someone to take me somewhere
16. use calculator just for multiply 12 with 2
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Till the end
today is the last day of school, officially
what would i miss the most?
(number isn't the priority)
1. hangin' out with the sophomores before school starts
2. wondering around the school with the green flip flop or the fake ugg
3. hangin' out with Sheena, Melissa, Shelby, Emily and couple people i dont know at the new cafe
4. woke up an hour after the alarm rings and doing morning routine
5. having cheerios honey nut or cinnamon something for breakfast
6. get into dad's car
7. taking 5 minutes to the school by car n seeing the other kids walking (how lazy i am!)
8. seeing the same couples kissing in the hall way
9. surfing the internet whenever i want
10. doing nothing in gym with melissa
11. gossiping someone with sheena that we both know well (i'm sorry somebody!)
12. take every steps on the stairs
13. waiting school bus number 50 with the juniors and other folks in the back parking lot
14. sitting in the third row at the right near the window in the school bus
15. walking across the backyard to go home
16. chatting with random seniors when i have free time
17. my homeroom with andy, tim, vas, brice, megan, tori and other people
18. senor jones and mrs redbord, the coolest homeroom teacher ever!
19. getting nervous while miss. kenney walk around checking math hw
20. finding my fun time staring at those twins ;)
what would i miss the most?
(number isn't the priority)
1. hangin' out with the sophomores before school starts
2. wondering around the school with the green flip flop or the fake ugg
3. hangin' out with Sheena, Melissa, Shelby, Emily and couple people i dont know at the new cafe
4. woke up an hour after the alarm rings and doing morning routine
5. having cheerios honey nut or cinnamon something for breakfast
6. get into dad's car
7. taking 5 minutes to the school by car n seeing the other kids walking (how lazy i am!)
8. seeing the same couples kissing in the hall way
9. surfing the internet whenever i want
10. doing nothing in gym with melissa
11. gossiping someone with sheena that we both know well (i'm sorry somebody!)
12. take every steps on the stairs
13. waiting school bus number 50 with the juniors and other folks in the back parking lot
14. sitting in the third row at the right near the window in the school bus
15. walking across the backyard to go home
16. chatting with random seniors when i have free time
17. my homeroom with andy, tim, vas, brice, megan, tori and other people
18. senor jones and mrs redbord, the coolest homeroom teacher ever!
19. getting nervous while miss. kenney walk around checking math hw
20. finding my fun time staring at those twins ;)
what else? tons of them..
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Army = eeewwwwww
A: She wants to join army??? eeeewwwww
is that what you say when someone lets her/himself die for your nation?
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